Hilarious Doctor Jokes!

brisbane health clinics

What did one tonsil say to the other tonsil?

Get dressed up, the doctor is taking us out!


Why did the cookie go to the hospital?

He was feeling really crumbie!

Why did the banana go to the doctor?

Because it wasn’t peeling well.

Why did the pillow go to the doctor?

He was feeling all stuffed up!

Why did the doctor lose his temper?

Because he didn’t have any patients!

Where does a boat go when it’s sick?

To the dock!
Doctor, Doctor, sometimes I feel like I’m invisible.

Doctor: Who said that?

Doctor, Doctor,I keep thinking I’m a vampire.

Necks, please!

Doctor, Doctor, I’ve got wind!

Can you give me something? Yes – here’s a kite!

Doctor, Doctor, everyone keeps throwing me in the garbage.

Don’t talk rubbish!

Doctor, Doctor, I swallowed a bone.

Are you choking?

No, I really did!

Doctor, Doctor, I keep seeing an insect spinning around.

Don’t worry, it’s just a bug that’s going around!

Doctor, Doctor, my baby’s swallowed a bullet.

Well, don’t point him at anyone until I get there!

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pack of cards.

I’ll deal with you later.